2 Irish men - Paddy and Keiron - decide to buy a pig each. When they get home, they realise they can not tell them apart.
“I’ll tell you what” said Paddy “I’ll cut an ear off mine so we can tell the difference”
Later that day Keiron comes running up to Paddy
“Your pig bit an ear off mine, now they’re the same again”
“I’ll tell you what” says Paddy “I’ll cut the other ear off mine”
Later that day Keiron comes running up to Paddy
“Paddy, your pigs bit the ear off mine again, now none of them have ears!”
“I’ll tell you what” says Paddy “I’ll cut the tail off mine”
Things are looking good until the next day
Keiron runs up to Paddy
“Your pig bit the tail off mine!” he shouts “Now what are we going to do?”
“I’ll tell you what” says Paddy…..
“I’ll have the black one, you have the white one”

adminIrish Jokes21 Oct, 2005No Comments

Paddy went for IQ test had to put the word “CONTAGEOUS” into a sentance.
Thats easy says Paddy, I asked my mate to dig a hole the other day and it took the contageous.

adminIrish Jokes21 Oct, 2005No Comments

Paddy goes for a job as Farrier.

The man interviewing him asks ” Have you ever shoed a horse before?”

Paddy answers, ” Well no sir, not exactly, but I once told a donkey to feck off”.

adminIrish Jokes21 Oct, 2005No Comments

paddy and murphy were walking down the street one afternoon, when a truck load of turf goes past and paddy turns to murphy and do you know i’d do that if i won the lottery, whats that then aks’s murphy,dig up my turf and send it away to be cut.

adminIrish Jokes21 Oct, 2005No Comments

Q-You hear about the irish man ironing his Curtains?

A-He fell out the window!

adminIrish Jokes21 Oct, 2005No Comments

Q: What is the definition of an Irish seven course dinner?

A: A steamed potato and a six pack.

adminIrish Jokes21 Oct, 2005No Comments

3 men an english man an irish man and a scottish man get stranded on an island when they see some trible men.they say ure captured now were gonna turn u into boats by ure skin.Now what would u like befor we skin u alive.The english man said il hv abottle of guiness.they got him th guiness then they killed him.The scottish man said il have some strong bow.Then they gave him it then killed him.The irish man said il hv a knife.They cave him a knife then he put holes in him self.then he said try make a boat out of me u SHITS!!!

adminIrish Jokes21 Oct, 2005No Comments

Paddy english man paddy scots man and paddy irishman found a bottle and a genie poped out and granted 3 wishs but one for each of them. Paddy Scots man said “I want all packies and brits out of scotland” *poof* nothing but scots is scotland. paddy englishman says “hey thats a good idea, ill have all the packies and blacks out of england with a 500 foot wall put around it” *Poof* nothing but english in england with a 500 foot wall all around england. Paddy irish man says “so he wanted england to be 100% english men and a 500 foot wall round it yea? my wish…… Fill it wit water!”

adminIrish Jokes21 Oct, 2005No Comments

how do u make a irishman dizzy?

put him in a barrel and tell him to piss in the corner

adminIrish Jokes21 Oct, 2005No Comments

What’s the difference between an Irish Wedding and an Irish Funeral?

adminIrish Jokes21 Oct, 2005No Comments