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What does a blonde say after multiple orgasms?
“Way to go team!”

How can you tell a blonde has had a bad day?
She has a tampon tucked under her ear and she can’t find her pencil.

Why did the blonde like the car with a sunroof?
More leg-room!

An airline captain was helping a new blonde flight attendant prepare for her first overnight trip. Upon their arrival, the captain showed the flight attendant the best place for airline personnel to eat, shop and stay overnight.

The next morning as the pilot was preparing the crew for the day’s route, he noticed the new stewardess was missing. He knew which room she was in at the hotel and called her up to ask what happened to her.
She answered the phone, crying, and said, “I can’t get out of the room!”

“You can’t get out of your room?” the captain asked. “Why not?” She replied, “There are only three doors in here,” she sobbed, “one is the bathroom, one is the closet, and one has a sign on it that says ‘Do Not Disturb’!”

A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender says, “Hi stranger, my name is Mike. I’ll give you a free beer if you Can guess the name of this bar in three tries.”

The man says, “Thanks…Mike’s Place?”

“Nope.”

“Mike’s Tavern?”

“No,”

“Mike’s Pub?”

“No, but here’s a free beer anyway. Nobody ever gut抯 it. The joint’s name is Sally’s Legs!

“That’s a good one.?the man says and proceeds to get royally ripped.

The next morning the man is still drunk and sitting on a curb, when a cop pulls up and asks him what he is doing there. He Responds, “I’m just waiting for Sally’s Legs to open, so I can wet my whistle!”

Q: What’s the difference between a blonde and a solar powered calculator?
A: The blonde works in the dark!

Q: Why do blondes get confused in the ladies room?
A: They have to pull their own pants down.

What do a blonde and a screen door have in common? The more you bang them the looser they get. What is the difference inbetween a blonde and a brick? The brick only gets layed once. What do a blonde and spaghetti have in common? The more you eat them the more they wiggle.

A blonde goes to the Western Union office and says, “I just have to get an urgent message to my mother in Europe.”

The clerk says it will be $100, and she replies “But I don’t have that much money, and I must get a message to her, it’s urgent! I’ll do anything to get a message to her.”

The clerk replies “Anything?”

“Yes… ANYTHING!” replies the blonde.

He leads her back to his office and closes the door. He tells her to kneel in front of him and unzip his pants.”

She does. “Take it out”, says the clerk.”

She does this as well. She looks up at him, his member in her hands and he says “Well… go ahead and do it…”

She brings her lips close to it and shouts “Hello?… Mom?”

In Vegas, a blonde walks up to a Coke machine and puts in a coin. Out pops a coke. The blonde looks amazed and runs away to get some more coins.

She returns and starts feeding the machine madly, and of course the machine keeps popping out the drinks.

Another person walks up behind the blonde and watches her antics for a few minutes before stopping her and asking if someone else could have a go.

The blonde spins around and shouts in her face: “Can’t you see I’m winning?”