Three clergymen were sitting in a boat, fishing.
“I’m thirsty,” said the first. “I’m gonna go get myself a Coke.” So he got out of the boat, walked across the water, and came back with his Coke.
“Ooh, that looks good,” said the second and got out of the boat. He walked across the water, got his Coke, and came back.
“You’re right,” said the third. “I think I’ll get one too.” He steps out of the boat and sinks like a rock.
“Hey,” said the first clergyman to the second, “should we tell him where the rocks are?”

sahilSports Jokes31 Mar, 2009No Comments

How come you can’t find lawyers sunbathing on the beach?

Cats keep covering them over with sand.

sahilLawyer Jokes31 Mar, 2009No Comments

There was blonde who wanted to go on a diet. She went to the doctor and asked for his advice. He said that she was going to go on a diet for three days — “Eat anything and everything you want for the first two days of your diet. Then on the third day, skip.”
So the blonde went home and ate anything and everything she wanted for the first two days, then she skipped the third day. The next day she went back to the doctor and he asked her, “How is your diet?” She said, “Well, the first two days were easy but that third day was hard. Doing all that skipping made me tired.”

sahilMedical Jokes31 Mar, 2009No Comments

Q: Why is it so hard to replace Vanna White?

A: They can’t find another blonde who knows the whole alphabet.

sahilBlonde Jokes31 Mar, 2009No Comments

A man walks into a bar with a duck on his head. The bartender says, “May I help you, sir?”

The duck says, “Yeah. Help me get this human out of my ass.”

sahilAnimal Jokes31 Mar, 2009No Comments

A hack golfer spends a day at a plush country club, playing golf and enjoying the luxury of a complimentary caddy. Being a hack golfer, he plays poorly all day. Round about the 18th hole, he spots a lake off to the left of the fairway. He looks at the caddy and says, “I’ve played so poorly all day, I think I’m going to go drown myself in that lake.”

The caddy looks back at him and says, “I don’t think you could keep your head down that long.”

sahilSports Jokes30 Mar, 2009No Comments

There was a lawyer and he was just waking up from anesthesia after surgery, and his wife was sitting by his side. His eyes fluttered open and he said, “You’re beautiful!” and then he fell asleep again. His wife had never heard him say that so she stayed by his side. A couple minutes later his eyes fluttered open and he said “You’re cute!” Well, the wife was dissapointed because instead of “beautiful” it was “cute.” She said “What happened to ‘beautiful’? His reply was “The drugs are wearing off!”

sahilMedical Jokes30 Mar, 2009No Comments

What do you get when you cross a corrupt lawyer with a crooked politician?
Chelsea Clinton.

sahilLawyer Jokes30 Mar, 2009No Comments

How did the blonde die raking leaves?

She fell out of the tree!

sahilBlonde Jokes30 Mar, 2009No Comments

The Alaska Department of Fish and Game recently issued this bulletin…

“Warning: In light of the rising frequency of human/grizzly bear conflicts, the Alaska Department of Fish and Game is advising hikers, hunters and fishermen to take extra precautions and keep alert of bears while in the field.
We advise outdoorsmen to wear noisy little bells on their clothing, so as not to startle bears that aren’t expecting them. We also advise outdoorsmen to carry pepper spray with them in case of an encounter with a bear.
It is also a good idea to watch out for fresh signs of bear activity. Outdoorsmen should recognize the difference between black bear and grizzly bear manure: Black bear manure is smaller and contains lots of berries and squirrel fur. Grizzly bear manure has little bells in it and smells like pepper.”

sahilAnimal Jokes30 Mar, 2009No Comments